after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
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