Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
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