Joe is yelling at the trees again.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
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