maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize
