I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
