btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize