So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
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