11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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