she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
she pinky promised me she was 18
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Randomize
