my vag is so smooth its legendary
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
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