so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Randomize
