I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
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