I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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