i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize