it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
