Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
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