im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
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