if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
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