Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
