i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
