I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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