YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
