I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize
