I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
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