Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Randomize
