Bisexual people are plain selfish.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
