Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
y did u give ur computer a hand job?
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
