Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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