he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
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First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
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I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"