I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
we're so committed to being not committed
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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