I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
