Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
