I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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