I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
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Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
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He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
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