we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
Randomize
