It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Randomize
