I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize