My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Send help, water and tortillas.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Randomize
