Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
