You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
