i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
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