DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
Randomize