That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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