I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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