She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
