Texts From Last Night

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  (518): View more from New York

  Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved

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  (518): Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved http://tfl.nu/xr5y
  Replies (11) Good night (1411) Bad night (521)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.

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  (651): dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression. http://tfl.nu/b05v
  Replies (20) Good night (697) Bad night (2577)
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  (765): View more from Indiana

  I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"

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  (765): I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock" http://tfl.nu/hksp
  Replies (30) Good night (9234) Bad night (1429)
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  (858): View more from California

  Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.

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  (858): Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel. http://tfl.nu/fcxh
  Replies (21) Good night (4734) Bad night (1104)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.

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  (610): As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet. http://tfl.nu/swmp
  Replies (18) Good night (10055) Bad night (986)
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  (763): View more from Minnesota

  Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.

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  (763): Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night. http://tfl.nu/r7p2
  Replies (7) Good night (5725) Bad night (1234)
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  (719): View more from Colorado

  You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians

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  (719): You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians http://tfl.nu/35a3
  Replies (3) Good night (2225) Bad night (739)
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  (808): View more from Hawaii

  some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday

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  (808): some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday http://tfl.nu/capv
  Replies (1) Good night (1740) Bad night (638)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.

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  (203): No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience. http://tfl.nu/6ty7
  Replies (11) Good night (1606) Bad night (890)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now

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  (508): Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now http://tfl.nu/n0um
  Replies (7) Good night (2637) Bad night (563)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid

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  (814): its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid http://tfl.nu/32bb
  Replies (2) Good night (814) Bad night (314)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.

  (224): View more from Illinois

  Those were right hand only?

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  (847): It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times. (224): Those were right hand only? http://tfl.nu/iwna
  Replies (2) Good night (751) Bad night (395)
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  (518): View more from New York

  I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"

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  (518): I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories" http://tfl.nu/in2x
  Replies (5) Good night (603) Bad night (342)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please

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  (973): if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please http://tfl.nu/glaf
  Replies (2) Good night (210) Bad night (585)
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray

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  (816): She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray http://tfl.nu/aoxt
  Replies (6) Good night (622) Bad night (142)

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