Duck Duck Cougar?
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
27 Unforgettable Hookup Texts
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
19 Groupies Confess What It’s Really Like To Hook Up With Famous Rockstars
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.