I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Randomize
