u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
These 25 People Believed Fake Facts For Way Too Long
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
23 Adults Confess The Irrational Fears They Had When They Were Kids
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?