dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
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