bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
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he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
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What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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