It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Randomize
