She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
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